Paxil; a day without

Wow, I thought I just wrote a bunch of stuff down.. turns out I didn't... I was just thinking about it. WEIRD. Anyways, today was funish... Toni phoned be right as I woke up. Actually, I woke up right before she did. I looked at my phone and it started ringing. I was like..woah. Toni and I rambled and philosophized, and waltzed around the town. It was amazing. We both had a lot of fun. I can tell. I met a sweet guy named Matt, he almost helped me solve my Life Puzzle. He gave me a lot of new ideas though. I'll write them online later. My friends have inspired me to write a book. Once I have a more set idea of what I've been thinking I'll forsure write down everything. I also want to get a more set idea of my Cartoon Acid story. I've kind of grown away from the idea of Kristi falling inlove. Toni has changed my mind to the more, kid's problems track and learning to cope kind of. I don't know. i need a better story line. I have the feelings, emotions, and character set out, but where is she going? What's she supposed to do? She should learn some kind of lesson. Learn to trust the universe? Learn to follow your heart? No hearts are GAY. Learn to.... cope with emotions. No.... Learn to... Some life lesson. I need to figure it out though. I had a fight with my mom today. An actual fight. Well, she brought it up, so I stood my grounds. I'm wise, she needs to understand the advice I'm giving her. Well, I guess she's hardheaded like me and needs to learn it herself. She just can't see clear enough to get it. But one day. One day. Ugh, I was going to spend the night at Tinu's, but I kind of chickened out in the end. I'm not sure what, but something about my room is too attatching right now. It's like my home. Well, obviously. But like, my special home. I think best in it. Well, tomorrow is my science test, hopefully I do good on it. If not.. Fuck the system. Haha. Owell, anyways I think I'm going to pass out now.

Paxil Day 7/8

It's 2 am on Tuesday morning. I had an interesting talk with a close family friend. It was quite pleasing. She actually listened. Today was.. alright. I had an English exam, though I've already mentioned. I think I did alright on it. I did have a traumatizing wake up call though, right before the examination. I think it was due to the emense crowd of people around me. Hmm. Well... I haven't slept for quite some time. Actually, today is the second night I have not slept. I didn't even nap today. I went for a walk around, though it's pretty chilly out. I layed on a picnic table and looked at the stars. Well, mainly the moon. There was a light shining in my eyes when I looked straight up so that sucked. I'm lost for words right now. I feel like a total droid. wepfoiwjfiwfjpawoignoavpiwmecpdifjwe;lafkjPOIQowijfaw'opegj;ld woiefnwefoiwafjpowijfasoeiwpefjwaoifj;. There's my input on life. Eric and I are to look at the stars later this week. I look forward to it. I have a sore in my mouth, it hurts. Oh man, last night feels like forever ago. I feel so empty, it's dreadful. It's like there's something missing. And no, I'm not hungry. I've tried stuffing my face all day but I end up with little satisfaction and a diseased feeling. I don't even feel like I'm real right now. This is so fake to me. FAKE. Like a mooooovie. I'm talking to Andrew. It's interesting. He's talking about revelations or something. i'm not paying attention. It's too hard right now. weofijw;alekfjwoifjwpofijas;lejfa;lsekjfwoifj. Gah. I am ghastly bored. Wrong context. Don't care. So bored.